Break the silence.

Chinese New Year was sooooo good.
So much so that I don't really wanna come back to KL anymore.

Not that I benci anyone here.
But I dread work.

Yesterday, I worked till this morning.
Due date is Thursday.

Why did I stretch myself like that?
I donno, fear of rejection I guess.

My squashed brain and tired body shout "Surrender"!
But something inside of me whispers "Hang on".

At 2am this morning. I talked to a friend.
Very wise indeed. She said that if I'm so scared that I can't perform well in what I'm doing, it only means this: "Deep down, you really love what you're doing".

Sorry, defeat. Not this time.


Here's what Daniel N. Nelson has to say:
"Defeat is being compelled to alter behavior to one's own detriment.
Rather than imposed by others' strength, defeat can occur without war or an opponent.
Defeat ultimately is self-failure - the symptoms of which are an irreparable imbalance between perceived or real threats and socioeconomic, political and military capacities.
In that regard, defeat is the utter breakdown of individual, community, or national security."


Anyway, silence is a good recovery. To all who follows my blog.
If I'm silent. Don't worry. I'm merely taking a healing break from work and life.

But blogging will continue. Because life goes on.

The day the dam broke.

In case you wonder why I didn't blog.

Mon
See sun - 7:50am
See bed - 1:00am

Tues
See sun - 8:15am
See bed - 2:00am

Wed
See sun - 8:00am
See bed - 12:00am

Thurs
See sun - 8:15am
See bed - 5:00am

Fri
See sun - 7:50am
9:30 am
Stupid gay colleague suddenly went crazy and threw threats at me just because I haven't had the time to look at his brief.

First sign of disaster - Water level rose to uncontrollable level.

SC (stupid colleague): Are you ok?
Me: No! Why are you being so difficult? (Trying to choke back my tears but failed)

Me: It's not that I don't want to read your job brief. (Gasping for breath, choking on tears) I have no time! I slept 3 hrs today and (Gasping for breath, choking on tears) came in to work by 9am because I can't finish my job.

Why are you threatening me? What did I do wrong? I'm actually quite easy to work with already. What do you want from me?

-SILENCE-

SC: Yea. You're right. It's just me. I'm so sorry! Sorry sorry. (Slowly walking away from me) Please forgive me.

[Flood continued terrorising my face for the next 30 minutes.
I had to hide in toilet.]

SC walked into my room again at 10:30am.
"Hey, I'm actually not that nasty one. We can talk if you want, k?"
If I'm not a Christian, you'll see me waving my longest finger at him.


Sigh. Approval for my job (I've been working on it since Monday) only came at 5pm just now.
Unfortunately, a lot of new jobs piled up.
Need to work from home during weekend.


FACT
Girls are usually more 'emo' (emotional) when they don't get enough sleep.

Lessons to be learnt
1. Sometimes, even man can have PMS-like symptoms (sudden anger & irrational behaviour).
2. Don't mess with someone who can really cry.

Tsunami-ed

Dreadful amount of work.
18 hours of suffocation (more to come).
Anticipated rejection.

I need a break. =(

Out of the Blue

Where in the world did that come from?

Yesterday, I was happily heading to my dinner location when something really unpredictable came my way.

I got a call from the most unexpected person.
This person then asked me the most unexpected question.
My reaction was of course unexpected.

What is the full story I won't reveal, let's just say that someone is interested in hiring me and sort of asked me to name my price.

Was I tempted? Very. But I didn't tell him how much I'm worth. Haha.
I can always freelance, right? =)

Moral of the Story?
It feels good to be wanted.


Oh Lord, I can feel your blessing. Happy weekend everyone!